People in love make me want to vomit
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize