I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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