You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
