I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
