he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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