Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
