I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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