yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
high people should be assigned attendants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize