Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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