so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
