So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
