my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
