When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
one might say we're banned from that church
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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