ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
