would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
