Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Couch. On fire.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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