quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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