I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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