I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
he shaved USA in his pubs
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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