i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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