Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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