This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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