My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I wish you could order shots online.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
