This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize