Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
So. Much. Porn.
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