put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
