I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
