So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
