youre lurking in front of me
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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