Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today