Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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