Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
