Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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