dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID