i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Only a mothe r could love this liver
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
