Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
