I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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