Non-Jews are for practice
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize