Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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