I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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