i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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