Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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