Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
there is puke in my bra ... again
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
