So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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