Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
