She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
