i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
It's just like the Real World with babies
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I just found puke in my bra..
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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