I could have mohawked her pubes.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
