Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
