when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, he came in my armpit
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize