Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
